mantra – Inform and Inspire: C. W. Stratton

Trauma and Meditation

C.W. Stratton

Trauma can leave a deep imprint on an individual’s emotional and physical well-being. For many, the effects of trauma manifest as anxiety, depression, difficulty concentrating, a constant state of tension, or operating in survival mode on a constant basis. While therapy and other forms of treatment play a significant role in recovery, an often overlooked yet powerful tool for healing is meditation.

Here’s how meditation helps in addressing trauma and promoting emotional resilience:

1. Regulating the Nervous System

Trauma can cause the nervous system to become dysregulated, often keeping us in a state of hyperarousal (fight, flight, or freeze mode). This leads to feelings of anxiety, irritability, anger, and stress. Meditation works to activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for rest and relaxation. Through mindfulness practices, one can learn to calm their minds and body, helping with becoming more grounded and present.

2. Building Emotional Awareness

Many who are dealing with trauma experience emotional numbness or avoidance, where they disconnect from their feelings to protect themselves. Meditation encourages self-reflection and awareness, creating a safe space to reconnect with and process emotions in a non-judgmental way. Over time, this fosters emotional resilience and a deeper understanding of one’s internal world.

3. Reducing Flashbacks and Intrusive Thoughts

Flashbacks and intrusive thoughts are common symptoms of trauma, and they can be distressing and disruptive. Meditation, especially mindfulness-based practices, helps individuals gain more control over their thought patterns. By staying focused on the present moment and learning to observe thoughts without attaching to them, survivors can reduce the power of flashbacks and break free from the loop of intrusive thinking.

4. Promoting a Sense of Safety

For those who have experienced trauma, it can be difficult to feel safe within their own bodies. Meditation encourages grounding techniques that promote body awareness and safety. Guided body scans or breathwork meditations are particularly effective in helping survivors tune into their bodies, rebuild trust in their physical sensations, and develop a sense of calm and safety from within.

5. Healing Through Self-Compassion

Those who experienced trauma often carry feelings of guilt, shame, or self-blame. Meditation fosters self-compassion by allowing individuals to approach their experiences with kindness and acceptance, rather than judgment. This shift in mindset can be transformative, helping survivors release the emotional burdens they carry and begin to heal from a place of love and understanding.

6. Improving Sleep and Restfulness

Many people who have experienced trauma struggle with sleep disturbances such as insomnia, nightmares, or restless sleep. Regular meditation practice can improve sleep quality by calming the mind before bed, reducing hypervigilance, and promoting relaxation. Mindfulness and breathing techniques are particularly effective at enhancing restfulness and making it easier to fall and stay asleep.

Conclusion

Meditation is a powerful tool that complements traditional trauma therapies. By helping to regulate the nervous system, reduce intrusive thoughts, and cultivate self-compassion, meditation can aid survivors in their healing journey. It is an accessible, self-directed practice that empowers individuals to regain control over their minds and bodies, paving the way for long-term recovery and emotional well-being.

Incorporating even a few minutes of meditation into your daily routine can make a significant difference in how you cope with and heal from trauma.

Depending on the severity of the trauma, one may want to consider practicing with a partner, a therapist, or other professional who is knowledgeable about trauma and meditation techniques.

Addiction: Is There An Answer?

C.W. Stratton

There are many reasons that an individual starts down the path of addiction. People have studied addiction, looking for ‘the answer.’ Many of us acknowledge that not a single reason equates to full-blown addiction.

The many studies, theories, opinions, and research around the subject still have many people scratching their heads, resulting in assumptions about the cause. Some things that are known to be contributing factors include:

Genetic Factors
Environmental Factors
Psychological Factors

Although these are significant factors associated with addiction, we still wonder – why do people use?

If we look at genetics as a contributing factor, the gene identified within the person doesn’t eventually fire off at a moment’s notice. The person decides to use a given substance; despite never being a user of substances. People don’t wake up one morning and say, “I’ll go to the liquor store and start drinking every day,” or, “I think I’ll find the neighborhood dope dealer and become a regular customer.”

The environmental cause doesn’t mean the person “catches addiction” like you would catch a cold. However, poverty, lack of educational opportunities, and poor role models all contribute.

We have to look at the individual’s psychological makeup to determine why someone would use substances and become addicted.

I know, I know, these three factors can be viewed deeper, including research and study outcomes. However, each of the three categories has a common denominator – feelings and emotions.

Whatever The Reasons, There Are Feelings And Emotions

You know feelings – those things that we do our best to guard and to avoid discussing. But beyond more research, there are reasons we know. People use to change the way they feel. Whether it is to change their feelings or to bury the feelings, they are having. We hear this most often talked about in recovery support meetings, too.

The way we deal with feelings often dictates how our day will be and how we respond or react to different situations.

Feelings and Emotions Challenge Us

Feelings and emotions also challenge our commitment to the recovery process. A feeling is an emotional state or reaction. At the same time, emotion is a natural, instinctive state of mind deriving from one’s circumstances, mood, or relationship with others. In many instances, the two tend to be confused with one another.

Reflecting on the internal reasons people engage in destructive/addictive behavior, feelings or emotions often fuel their thoughts and actions. A good example is that feeling of inadequacy. We may feel inadequate in specific settings or situations.

However, some people feel inadequate in most situations, no matter the circumstances.

These people may yearn to have this feeling quieted, especially as they see their peers presenting as confident, secure, and comfortable in those social situations.

Feelings Fuel Our Decisions

“Preaching at people about behaviours, even self-destructive ones, did little good when I didn’t or couldn’t help them with the emotional dynamics driving those behaviours.”― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

Feelings and emotions are known to drive our decision-making. Being controlled by these is dangerous and detrimental to our recovery. The following is a partial list of complicated feelings and emotions and may lead a person back to use.

Anger
Anxiety
Being Overwhelmed
Depressed
Excitement
Frustration
Guilt
Happiness
Inadequacy
Insecurity
Shame

We can add many more because it doesn’t matter what we are experiencing, but our response to it is most critical.

We’re going to have many feelings and emotions, and the root of these often comes from outside sources, which means we can control how we respond and whether we choose to return to active addiction because we don’t like the way we’re feeling.

Active Addiction Can Stop If We Don’t Relapse

Being reactive to situations that arise in our lives places us at greater risk for relapse. And, when this does occur, we often realize that we should have handled a given situation differently and not reacted to our feelings and emotions.

As a result, we may continue to use substances after that relapse. If we are lucky, we will get another opportunity to recover. It takes weeks, months, and even years for some to get back into recovery. The delay in returning to meetings or reconnecting with those who had previously supported us isn’t always connected to the obsession and compulsion to use; it’s sometimes centered around the guilt and shame that we acquired along with way.

Guilt and Shame Keep People in Active Addiction

These two feelings can destroy the core of an individual, especially as it relates to recovery. We are ashamed to let those know we returned to active addiction. We become consumed with guilt about our actions. Often, we’ll think that if we don’t go back to those meetings, everyone will assume we’re going to other meetings.

We say to ourselves, “I’ll never go back to that meeting; maybe I’ll try to hold on and make it seem that everything’s alright.” As we continue with these thoughts, the delay in returning to the very place that has saved us and provided a new life for ourselves becomes even greater.

I Know That Feeling and Emotion

Over time, we can get to a place where feelings and emotions no longer dictate the directions in which we go. Being able to name specific emotions and feelings as they arise is critical in this process.

Many have the instinct to run and hide when certain emotions or feelings emerge. The running or hiding sometimes manifests as acting out in some way.

We either turn on others, but most importantly, we turn on ourselves. Reflect on a time where an outside source provoked intense feelings or emotions (someone disrespected you, hurt you, or embarrassed you), and the automatic thought is to lash out or react in some way.

When we don’t address the matter head-on, our behavior tends to display, “I’ll show you, I’ll hurt me.” We do something destructive that will only impact our lives and not affect the other person – that’ ‘turning on ourselves.’

Feelings and emotions will always exist; we won’t be able to avoid them as they surface. Managing them and acquiring healthy ways to respond are most important. We must begin working through them and fully experience the feeling and emotion to understand better what it’s all about. Or to find out why we respond and react to certain things as we do. Everyone doesn’t react to a given feeling or emotion that same way.

Go Ahead and Feel It

Some subconsciously talk themselves out of an appropriate response by going back to the “default” response. We return to what’s familiar but not necessarily comfortable. Look at what your given “default” response is, then assess the results of it. I’m sure we can find “fault” with the “default.”

Many of our responses to situations are related to our belief systems. Our belief systems have affected us on many levels. We learned these from one another through observation, imitating, and modeling. From the beginning of our lives, we know how to respond to certain situations based on how others have.

We adopted this to the point that we believe this is just who I am and how I am. My position is that it’s only an excuse not to do the work to get a better outcome of what we are seeking. This is an example of how our beliefs can impact our recovery.

Your friend, family member, or spouse tells you “no” to something, or they are critical toward you about an action you have taken. We believe that this person is mean, doesn’t know what they are talking about, or doesn’t want us to succeed in this process.

Then we get angry, upset, hurt, or even embarrassed. What we tend to do is curse, slam doors, stop talking to the person, and even go as far as to use substances. The domino effect (from beliefs to feelings to actions) can be catastrophic. This example is an activating event.

Feelings and Emotions Activate the Events

We have allowed many events to control our feelings, emotions, and actions. We have made them responsible for how we think, feel, and act. Now, it’s time to return this control to ourselves.

Recovery helps people get a different perspective on their lives. This process isn’t just about “not using” substances; this also requires an internal transformation.

We have responded to many things in ways we have regretted and wish we had a do-over. Learning from the outcomes of our reactive and impulsive behavior of the past is crucial. We are not perfect, but to measure the quality (not quantity) of recovery, we must look further within.

Internal battles do not have to last a lifetime – we can bring peace to our recovery, and peaceful is a feeling and emotion that’s worth working towards.

Out with the Old – In with the New

C.W. Stratton

“Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change.” -Jim Rohn

Recovery consists of making significant adjustments in our lives. New in recovery, we have a lot of baggage that’s weighed us down for years.

All that excess baggage often dictates how we move through the world. And for most of us, that baggage is cumbersome and restricts us from entering many places.

Due to this heavy load and the room it has taken up in our lives, we had trouble fitting in anywhere.

However, if we’re going to flourish in our recovery, we have to examine that baggage. It’s time to go through some of those pieces and rid ourselves of what is still harming our recovery.

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.”― Jim Rohn

People: Finding New Connections

We have formed connections with some fascinating people during active addiction; we were loyal to these individuals to a fault. Even after deciding to turn our lives around and enter recovery, we continued being loyal to them. Despite all the suggestions we’ve heard in counseling and meetings, we continued to hold on, even when people cautioned us that our continued association with them could be devastating to our recovery.

We made excuses for these individuals, and we made excuses for why we continued associating with them. Through trial and error and, in some cases, a relapse, we realized that changing our associations and connections is key to our growth and development in the recovery process. So, how can you start breaking away from those old associations?

Begin reaching out to those in recovery
Get involved in recovery based functions
Enquire about making a commitment in a given meeting (being a coffee maker or greeter)
Obtain a sponsor
Talk to those who you wouldn’t normally speak to that are in self-help meetings
Don’t focus on individual differences; look at similarities when trying to make a new connection

As adults, it seems that many of us have a difficult time making new friends. I would jokingly suggest those with children follow their children around and they’ll teach you how to make friends.

Some of us think we don’t need more friends, but when we look at our friends, there is a distinct connection between those people and active addiction. In other words, the only thing we had in common was the act of using substances together. Think about how easy it was to talk to a stranger to get your drug of choice or talk to the liquor store man you’ve never met, but you spoke to them with ease.

A simple, “Hello, my name is…” We are now beginning conversations to enhance our lives, not to destroy our lives anymore.

And remember, they didn’t know how to be social when they entered the rooms, either.

Places: Finding Somewhere New

We maintained rituals and routines during our use of substances. There were places that we would go to like clockwork. If someone were observing our daily movements during this time, they would know where we were and consistently going. Some of us went to the local bar or liquor store right after work (or before), and even the merchants could predict when we would arrive.

Today, we must begin with new routines and rituals that are healthy and conducive to our recovery. Here are a few changes we can make:

Attend a meeting before or after work
Ask a few people from your support network out for dinner
There are recovery events that local 12-step meeting groups organize (dances, hiking, camping, etc.)
Locate social events that will not harm your recovery

Things: Look for the Triggers

This area may seem a little difficult to avoid. Some have difficulty hearing a soda can opened in a recovery support meeting – it has taken people to the times of drinking, the first one.

Sound and smell memories are wired into our brains. Considering this, we may want to work further on the cognitive aspect of the recovery process. For example, we know that the sound of a soda can opening may actually be a soda can and not a beer.

Given this, we must acknowledge that we have worked diligently on our recovery and have made the needed changes to avoid high-risk situations. Over time, certain sounds are just the sounds of the environment around us.

These adjustments to our reactions don’t happen overnight, but with time we overcome those recalls. Also identified was a song(s) that may remind us of using substances. Making changes to the things in our lives that have impacted our life’s negativity is crucial:

When it comes to a specific song that reminded us of using, we have a wide variety of choices and genres of music that we can now enjoy without that recall.
Certain smells that bring us back to that time require us to modify our thinking and realize that we are no longer in those places where we used substances; we are in a safer place in our lives.
Lighters, spoons, or other things we use in getting high have their normal function. Lighters are used in everyday society for different uses other than substances. Spoons are utensils used for eating. It may sound easier said than done, but as the quality of our recovery increases, we change our thinking about these things.

Getting Back to New Basics

I find it helpful and inspiring to look back at and identify things we used to enjoy doing before drugs and alcohol became the priority. I’m sure we can remember quite a few. However, once we introduced substances, we discontinued those enjoyable things.

Some of us may say, “I don’t do that anymore” or “I’m too old to do that now.” Those are excuses used not to revisit those things. Here are some things many recovering people have identified as enjoyable that they discontinued doing in their active addiction:

Being creative with their hands
Drawing
Hiking
Riding a bike
Just taking a walk in the park observing the natural environment
Reading or Writing
Playing an instrument
Sports (actually playing the sport for leisure activity)

Change Doesn’t Have to be Dreary

“When you know what you want, and you want it bad enough, you’ll find a way to get it.”― Jim Rohn

Recovery is a process of absolute change. We must change the way we think about ourselves and the things around us. Recovering people must have increased awareness of the high-risk situations that can lead to relapse. Change is uncomfortable, but being uncomfortable to better ourselves is less painful than continuing to use substances and creating havoc on yourself with only having three options available; jails, institutions, and death.

While this isn’t a definitive list of things to replace, this will give a basic premise and a starting point for change. We must dig deep within ourselves and decide what is most important. If we can say “WE” are more important, we must begin that uncomfortable journey of resolve and healing. We don’t always have to wait until the pain is too much to bear to make life changes. Please make the needed changes; your recovery and life depend on it.

The Burn Within

C. W. Stratton

The moments come and go. The sheer desire to recapture some of those moments, because many of them were opportunities, can have such a negative impact on our moving forward in our course of life. The aspect of remaining with the status quo, in many instances, is the reason we allow opportunities to pass by. Is this about fear? Is it about the concern of what others will think? Or, can it be that deep down you may not truly believe you deserve something better that what you currently have? Possibly, it can be something other than what was mentioned. When it’s all said and done, you will know the true reason for missed opportunities; not the excuses you may relay to others.

Conditioning is the idea of training or accustoming a person to behave in a certain way. Many of us have been conditioned to behave and respond to certain things in a particular way. For the more open-minded individual, assessing your life experiences and closely looking at your responses to new things that may arise in your life, is critical. When something different or new arises, is the response “oh this is new, I’m very interested in this”. Or, is the new thing or situation scrutinized and dissected before it’s really investigated? Not to mention if others are initially scrutinizing the new thing, many of us will fall in line with the same scrutinizing response. This is the in-group/out-group idea. Many of us would prefer to be a part of the group opposed to outside the group; even if you don’t internally agree with the consensus. Some will tolerate the burn within the soul to remain with the group. What is this about?

There was a time when making a decision on my own, or having an independent thought, despite what the majority said, was the most frightening thing. We ultimately take stock in what others think, despite what we tend to say verbally. However, is it good stock or bad stock? Learning to hear the positive messages takes a level of mindfulness and determination if you are to fulfill those innate passions in life. The whole idea of being alone with making a decision or having an independent voice about a given subject can be intimidating for some. To relay your truth and have your voice heard requires risk. Risks have been taken by some of the most productive and inspiring people. Wouldn’t you like to be productive and inspiring?

The fear can’t be allowed to restrict you from your goals in life. You are a person with individual thoughts and feelings. Have you ever been in a situation when a group that you were a part of were making a decision about something and you didn’t agree with the decision, but you didn’t speak up to present the idea you had, and the outcome wasn’t good? What did you tell yourself? Did you tell anyone the idea you had? This is something that occurs regularly, and the result is regret and resentment towards self. Remember there are some places we just don’t fit in, because they are too small for us.

It’s time to recondition the mind and get rid of the box that has been built around you. It’s not just about thinking outside the box, because that’s only for a moment; the box must be destroyed.

the_missing_ puzzle piece

To Evolve

pink and white lotus flower — Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

C.W. Stratton
Evolve is a word or concept that continually gets thrown around, especially as it relates to doing better or improving. So, why aren’t we more inclined to use the word better or improve? Maybe it’s due to the aforementioned words appearing too plain, bland, or self-explanatory. The word Evolve may seem more of a process that includes sequential stages. Or, it may be a word that is used by intellectuals to identify the process of change and its importance. The definition of Evolve is to achieve or develop gradually, or to produce by natural evolutionary processes. No matter how you may interpret the word, the simple concept is about change; if it be in position, thinking or way of living.
This short writing is just a preliminary/introduction to ideas and breakdown of EVOLVE. Evolve is change. Evolve in this context is about positive change and evolve is a process that will hopefully result in lasting change. EVOLVE will present steps and positive ways to identify barriers that many of us may have, or have failed to recognize, in our pursuit of making lasting change in our lives. Some of those barriers are a result of past experiences, not necessarily traumatic experiences, but experiences that have impacted our thinking and ways of doing things. You know, those things we consider NORMAL, when in fact they really aren’t. You may not be able to recognize the faulty thinking patterns at the moment, and how they have guided some of the impulsive/bad decisions that we may have made along our journey. We will get an opportunity to truly embark on our past experiences in the world and hopefully obtain a different perspective of our current position. In doing this, we will begin working on the Self-Narrative; the story we tell ourselves about ourselves. The Narrative has had significant role in how we have lived our lives. It has guided us to this point and it’s time to change it. The same story we tell ourselves is the story we tell the rest of the world. Change may be needed. EVOLVE is coming but in the meantime, look within and begin identifying the faulty thinking/beliefs and assess the narrative that you’ve relayed to yourself over and over.

EVOLVE

This a concept that has so many perspectives. An all inclusive post regarding this is coming real soon.

C.W. Stratton

With Me or Against Me

C. W. Stratton

Believe yourself

“Be yourself, because everyone else is already taken.”

~Oscar Wilde

Saying “if you’re not with me, you’re against me”, isn’t an accurate statement in many respects. However, you will hear this statement made in many settings/interactions; family, friends, social and employment. There are those times when an individual doesn’t actually verbalize these exact words but if you don’t agree with a position they hold on a given situation, this is relayed; even non-verbal. Some people are shunned or talked about when they’re not present because that individual has decided to take an independent position regarding a given situation. There are instances when a group of individuals may have an idea about a particular situation and since the majority agrees with what’s presented, it is relayed as accurate. However, amongst that group there is a tendency of at least one individual within that group that may not actually agree with the consensus. This can be quite challenging for that individual and there are times where that individual may have the accurate information but feels compelled to stand with the group and not “rock the boat”. The contributing factor regarding this could be a fear of rejection or our desire to please others.

There are so many that have been in that position and over time of consistently doing this, they make it a common practice. The fear of having an original thought and not exposing it, especially when accurate, can have a negative impact on the outcome of what’s being discussed, along with impacting your growth and development as a person. Fear is crippling in itself and the fear of what others think about you can be just as damaging. We have the innate ability to have independent thoughts and actions but there are times when you choose the easy route and allow others to make the decisions for us; through agreeing with the majority even if we don’t really agree. Think of a situation(s) when you were amongst others and there was a consensus about something and you didn’t agree with, but never said anything. Many of us wish that moment could occur again so we could speak up. It brings you back to “If you’re not, with me, you’re against me”. Would it be such a tragedy to relay what you know to be true, despite the majority’s position? No! It would mean you’re expressing your knowledge of a given situation and your desire for a positive outcome. Just because my thoughts are unlike others doesn’t mean I’m against them. It means I don’t agree with what’s being relayed; that’s all. It shouldn’t create resentment, distrust or perpetuate a lack of commitment to the group.

We all have some sort of standard when it comes to morals, beliefs and values. When we encounter interactions or discussions that totally go against those standards, we shouldn’t have to compromise them in order to please others. It’s not what others think about us that’s important, what’s important is what we think of ourselves. Because at the end of the day, we are left with our own thoughts and assessments of situations. Do we rest peacefully, or do we lay with regret? Live Life Fulling, Live Life Wholeheartedly, Live Boundless.

Emotional Intellect

Life has the tendency or throwing us for a loop emotionally, but we must remain resilient in our pursuits.

C. W. Stratton

Rollercoaster emotions

“How people treat you is their karma; how you respond is yours.”

~Wayne Dyer

During our lifespan we will be challenged on so many levels; physically, psychologically and emotionally. There are those of us who have overcome significant obstacles, both physically and psychologically. However, emotional obstacles tend to trip us up along our journey. Although we may convince ourselves we are attuned to what we are experiencing emotionally at given times, we may not truly know what emotion we are truly experiencing. With this said, we tend to verbalize an emotion that’s easy to relay when we are asked what we are experiencing at the moment. Many times we say:

*I’m good

*I’m alright

*I’m pissed

None of the above are actually emotions, nor are they feelings. We utilize the aforementioned on many occasions to avoid feeling vulnerable. Those statements are protective factors in some respect. Many of the emotions that we experience usually stem from an outside source; it’s not usually physical. Those outside sources sometime touches a sensitive part of us which generates a reaction; discomfort or pain. There are those of us when confronted by the external actions, it touches a vulnerable place within our minds also. The faulty thinking that may accompany what is occurring, allows the actions of the external stimuli to reside there for extended periods of time. This creates a host of confusing feelings and emotional responses, to the point that we have difficulty identifying what we are really experiencing. As a result, we default to our usual way of handling things; whatever that may be for you.

There are those times when emotional confusion occurs and this can happen when we are confronted by some form of reality. When outside stimuli is involved in a given situation we have the tendency to say, “they are pushing my buttons”. Remember that buttons are on clothing and gadgets. We are not clothing or some kind of gadget that has a button that requires pushing in order to be activated. We are beings that can actually dictate emotional responses when encountering a given situation. The most important aspect of dictating emotional responses is to become informed and fully aware of what we are experiencing. Having the discipline to “pause” and assess a situation before reacting is critical to the process of becoming more “emotionally intelligent”.

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to recognize one’s own emotions and the emotions of others, and to identify them appropriately. The information obtained from this can assist in guiding thinking and behavior. Specific identification of what we are experiencing or witnessing is paramount. This is not a task that can be accomplished overnight, this takes time. Given that virtuous effort is placed into becoming fully aware, we begin that path of peace and hopefully nirvana. No matter the experience or source of that experience, keep pushing forward.

Be Present With Your Experiences

listening-with-mindfulness

C. W. Stratton

Having the strength and courage to face difficult times as they arise has the tendency of creating growth and resiliency; including internal fortitude that can guide you throughout your journey. When initially faced with difficulty or adversity, many have the impulse to run or attempt to create an altered reality of the situation. Many times, this is done to avoid pain or discomfort associated with the experience. Embracing the situation and experiencing the feelings associated has the propensity of building character and provide assistance in obtaining a clear, realistic perspective of the circumstances being faced.

If the option of avoiding or covering up the experience is chosen, limitations and lack of clarity can be formed. When this occurs, the situation or circumstances will never be seen for what they really are. We will alter the experience to our liking in such a way that it makes the individual feel they are managing the situation. This is the process of fooling ourselves but ultimately this is “self-deception”.

The neglecting of the self and the experiences around us become habitual over time. What occurs eventually is that an alternative reality is created which brings about internal suffering. The habit of altering what’s real brings about an abundance of life-dissatisfaction, envy, disappointment and resentment. As a result of this, our world becomes so much smaller with every experience that we choose to alter. We don’t always have to experience pain and discomfort in order to learn and grow, but in order to fully experience life we may want to embrace all of our experiences.

There will always be storms that surface at an expected time, but remember that storms always pass. Live in your true reality and experience because you will always shine at the end of the day. Don’t not allow fear to dictate your experiences with the world. Dig deep within yourself, be present and utilize the strength and courage that already exists within you.

Get It Where You Fit In

Being “Original” in thought and action is an accomplishment we all strive for.

C. W. Stratton

To be “Original” is to be independent in thought or action. Then you have the obvious definition; to be the first. However, we will concentrate on the first listed definition and assess how this plays out in some of our personal lives. For some, the idea of being independent in thought or actions can be quite scary. This may be due to the fear of what others may say or think about us. As a result of this, we default to living off of someone else’s’ idea’s, successes, achievements, and direction. Although our learning is rooted from obtaining information from outside sources such as parents, friends, teachers or colleagues, many us have remained dependent on these sources even in adulthood. Our dependency on the aforementioned makes decision-making and problem solving non-existent; no effort needed.

Standing alone or standing for something you believe in, when no one else will, can be nerve-racking and frightening. Since we refuse to experience these feeling, we decide to follow the status quo, even if we don’t agree with it internally. We compromise our inner-strength, knowledge and natural abilities, just to fit in. Eventually we are encapsulated by the opinions, beliefs and values of others. Obviously, not all of us can be originators of ideas and certain accomplishments but at some point in the process we should have acquired our own direction for our lives, as we see fit. There are those who have inadequacies and insecurities that have been engrained in us over the years. We bring those same inadequacies and insecurities into our current circumstances. The fear of revealing these keeps us motivated to fit in where we may actually never fit it. This creates life-dissatisfaction and a lack of fulfillment.

We must begin tapping into our innate abilities and identify what our true passions are in life. This will provide direction which will result in becoming motivated to be our true-selves. Fear can be a motivator but in many cases, it becomes a barrier to accomplishment. Courage must be found in the midst of fear. There are those who may not agree with the direction you have chosen for your life, but make sure your direction is positive, fulfilling and have the ability to reach others who may be in an indecisive place in their lives. Become an example of the wonders that life can offer and never short-change yourself when it comes to your goals and desires. You are only given one life, make it count.